Saturday, October 24, 2009

Chapter 7 Caught

“You’ve gotten too used to these kinds of people over the years, haven’t you?”

I turn around to see Dave standing in the hall with me. “You helped me get away?”

He nods with a small grin. “My power even works on him,” Dave tips his chin to indicate he means Michael. “When he’s distracted.”

“He is a little distracted.” It’s an understatement.

“Can I walk you up to your room?”

Dave seems to have leaned in a bit so that now he is much too close and looking at me in a way that makes my heart snap in warning. “I really think you shouldn’t.”

Dave doesn’t move even as I try to pull back a bit. “Please, trust me.” he says almost in a whisper. I find that I do trust him. Dave strikes me as different from the others.

“You do realize the last person to say something like that to me was Michael.”

He‘s quiet for a moment and then I remember that they probably have a different name for him. He seems to know who I mean, though. “Sorry. How about ‘why not?’”

It’s his eyes. My instincts still say good, different, not like them. Even with Michael, I had an inkling before things went wrong. There is no inkling, no splotches of darkness hidden behind a kind exterior.

The corners of his mouth turn up slightly in a small thankful smile for giving him my trust when he knows I don’t have to, and probably shouldn’t. I don’t even glance back at the room to see if anyone has noticed our absence.

“This is your room?” Dave glances around the darkened room taking in everything with an awe that almost worries me. “This isn’t what I would have expected. I mean, you are his servant, right?”

He walks towards the balcony. “And you call him ‘Michael‘. You’ve known him a long time, haven’t you? Since he broke out of the labs.”

My bare feet make no sound as they move me towards Dave who stands with his back to me. "Well, yes."

“I remember you.” Dave glances back at me with another friendly smile. “I was very pissed at being 'rescued' by a girl a few years younger than me.”

I think back to the one time I ever managed to successfully rescue anyone. I had caught Michael by surprise that day. “In the farming village-- but that was years ago. That was you? When did you join his group?” Slowly, I start walking towards him.

Dave turns to me with a slightly mischievous grin. “I didn’t.” A fog settles over me, warning me of danger. “You of all people have to know what a danger he is. Your parents must have been in that lab. Or your guardians.”

He looks at me pleadingly. “I need your help.”

“Help how?”

“I need to kill him. But I know I could never get close enough. Even with my power, he can sense me when I get within a certain range. But he wouldn't expect you.” Dave glances around the room again. "I've been watching. It's clear that you're a bit more to him than a servant."

Something should come out of my mouth. My tongue struggles to form words, but my mind is too far behind.

“You know what he does, Edith. You can’t be weak just because you’re safe now. He could turn on you at any moment.” Dave grabs my arms in his large hands. "Don't be afraid. You can speak freely now while I'm here with you. They don't even know I'm here."

He’s talking about killing Michael. And I can’t even consider it. Michael has done horrible things, but I still can’t find it in my heart to hate him enough to want him dead. Am I weak or under Michael’s mind control? Maybe it’s because I can’t help wondering about my life without him. Immediately I feel selfish for even thinking about it when there are so many others suffering.

Dave suddenly becomes silent and I realize its because he’s holding his breath. His eyes look past me, over my head at the doorway.

“Take your hands off her.”

Dread rises from my stomach before weighing itself down like lead. It's all I can do to remain standing as Dave's hands squeeze my arms.

Gina’s laugh sharply punctuates the silence and I realize I’m holding my breath as well. “Dropped your guard assassin.”

Next Chapter -->


  1. Uh about a cliff hanger! I hope that Michael doesn't take Edith's silence as an indication that she was seriously considering his proposal. He does NOT look happy. I find it interesting that the first thing he does is order Dave to take his hands off Edith. I'm probably reading too much into that.....

  2. Oh, wow! What a proposal! I'm not at all surprised that Michael knew just when to walk in there! I also wonder if Michael knew what Dave was up to all along? OMG, what is he gonna DO???

    Great chapter! I hope you have the next one ready for us soon!!! :)

  3. Ooooh! I wonder if Michael heard this conversation. Or you know, "heard" it, if you know what I mean! He definitely looks like he might have!

    Also, did I read correctly? Does Dave have the same power as Michael? If he does, and if Michael knows he does, I imagine that Michael would at the very least be keeping a really close eye on him.

  4. Thanks so much for reading guys, :)

    I don't want to say too much for fear of giving anything away! But you're all making interesting observations that I hope I will clearly confirm or deny or correct in the following chapters.

    Carla, regarding Dave's powers- his aren't exactly the same as Michael's. He sort of "makes things fuzzy." When he introduces himself to Edy, he tells her not to worry about remembering his name because she won't remember it anyway. And here, he makes a point of telling her that they don't really know he's there. (If you look back at Chapter 5-- only Edy's talking to him.)

    As I'm working on a different perspective story right now, I've come to the realization that true telepaths are really rare. While Dave's power might be similar to a telepath's in that he affects the mind and his power stems from his mind, it isn't as exact (i.e. he can't read thoughts). But I will say, in case it wasn't clear, he can make things fuzzy to the point he disappears. (Otherwise he'd just be stupidly bold here.)

    I'm working on a story from Gina's point of view right now, so there will be a bit more on this stuff.

  5. Glad I checked into blogger this morning.

    I wondered what Dave's ulterior motive was, I knew he couldn't be kind to Edith without a catch. I have to say, he is smart and observant, noticing things about the two of them and figuring using Edith would be the perfect way to get rid of Michael.

    I am wondering how far Edith's loyalty to Michael goes.

    Great chapter Lunar!

  6. I just realized something--am I channeling your names or something in my updates (Edith, and from this last one, Gina). Geez. I need to consult my list of names, lest it look like I'm taking straight from you!

  7. I've been wanting to read your story and am very glad I finally did! Fascinating world you have created and the relationship between Michael and Edith is complicated it seems. I get the sense she places her importance to Michael much lower than it really is.

  8. Thank you so much, Carnaxa. The question of Edy's loyalty is a great one. That's all I can say.

    LOL, Rachel. I kinda noticed you had a Gina working her way into your story. But if it's any consolation, I'm pretty sure you were writing about your Edith before I was.

    Thank you very much for reading, Gayl. Next chapter will add another layer to their relationship, I can promise that.

  9. Oh my! The enemy... it's Dave. He wants to kill Michael... but then Dave despite his power must be human? That would fit with the kid in the playground.
    And oh... Edy has no inkling there's bad in Dave, but he is suggesting she becomes his accomplice in... murder.
    I have no doubt that Edy is the 'sacrifice', but whose?
    ichael could have very well pretended not to notice Dave, to bait him with Edy by letting her stay in the room for a drink. He may actually have let the other experiments tease her and created the impression he was totally absorbed with Gina... for Dave to let his guard down.

    I absolutely love this story, lunarfox! The world you've created, the characters you have living in it, the opposing characters and roles of Edith and Michael... the use of war quotes to build and extend your plots! It's magnificent!

  10. omg, Moondaisy, thank you for reading. You've totally made my night!

    I will confirm right now that Dave is not human like Edy is; he really does have a power. Though I don't know that he was an experiment, because children of experiments have also been born with powers.

    As for the rest, yay for speculation! I really don't want to give anything away. But answers are coming. If not in this story, then in the next most definitely. I think this is the sort of story that requires more than one perspective.

  11. "I think this is the sort of story that requires more than one perspective..."
    Oh yes, definitely!
    I must admit, I enjoy the speculation as much as the reading and can hardly wait to read more. It's a wonderful gift to be able to make people stop and think with the magic of words. You have got that special gift!

  12. Very tense Lunar. hey, I saw Micheal getting off the sofa, I think he knew right away when Edy left his presence. Or I reading too much into it, LOL!
    Great cliffhanger, love that Michael's first verbalization is 'get your hands off her' speaks volumes on their connection.
    I think Dave is in the soup.
    Great update!!!

  13. There isn't a such thing as reading into too much. I'm glad you caught that. (Mostly because that was a pain to shoot!)

    "In the soup" is a new one for me! I totally had to look that up, lol! Yeah, things are not looking good for Dave here.

  14. Oh man, I have total chills! How wild! Maybe Michael is really that bad, since she can't sense any bad in Dave.... oooooh man! So good!!

    I totally saw Michael getting off the sofa too in the background! I was like oh man that's trouble!! (Or the darn sim didn't listen to you and hopped up on it's own LOL)

  15. Oh, I'm not even going to say how bad Michael is. Though I intend on posting another chapter this weekend.

    LOL. These sims have surprisingly well behaved. Well, except for that picture when he wouldn't refuse Gina.

  16. HOLY CRAP! The stuff just hit the fan!


    I think this is going on the list of favorite chapters. It flowed smoothly!

    Lovin' it!

  17. Thank you. I actually didn't like this chapter when I first put it up. It is important, a key chapter, but I really didn't like it. XP

  18. Holy moley!

    this story got, if possible, even better!

    It's all making sense to me now, and the story is coming together so well! that last scene was so intense!

    This must have taken some pretty careful planning!

    Ooooh, I can't wait to see! And it's interesting to get it from Dave's point of view rather than Edy, who clearly has a soft spot for Michael.

  19. Thanks, Bbop. Yeah, this story had a lot of little details that I really had to hammer out. I just wrote it and then moved the pieces around until they fit. XD

    I also did a lot of writing and rewriting of bits and adjusting. nothing was settled until it was published.

    Yes, Edy has a very big soft spot for Michael, despite what she's seen that he's capable of.

  20. Wow Lunar that was brilliant! I am couldn't tear my eyes away!

    Dave wanting to kill Michael I didn't see that coming. But was Edith right in trusting Dave for that short second. Doing so may have just got her in big trouble.

  21. Jennifer, oh thank you again. Really!

    It's been nice to revisit these older chapters and hear your reactions to the turning points in the stories.